Sunday 30 September 2012

- all praises to Allah -

Salam,
Alhamdulillah, today - Sept 30, 2012, i'm officially 30. thank you Allah for blessing me with such a beautiful life. i feel so small... as i have live for 30 years, lotsa loopholes in my amalan. i feel so shame that i'm sinful, ya Allah please forgive me, give me the strength to improve my imaan and please don't let me go astray.

i feel like crying when i'm thinking of my life that granted by Allah. He always there for me, holding my hand whenever i fall, being my light in the darkness and being my companions when my heart was broken. He always there for me, despite my all wrongdoing and sins that i have commit, ya Allah, you're such ar-rahman and ar-raheem... there nothing greater than You, the all mighty.

Ya Allah, i'm grateful for all Your loves and cares. I love You and and also Rasullullah very much. please give me the opportunity to see You in jannah ='(


Sunday 16 September 2012

2nd

Salam,
 
second post for today... actually i'm quite free today, tu macam ada masa skit melayan blog =)
after hujan cats and dogs tadi, we went out. saja nak bawak anak2 ambik angin luaq. we went to the lake, bout 5 mins drive from our home. the kids was so excited.
 
Rizqi Idraki Harith is now 4, while Maryam Mia Zahraa Harith is 2 years old. jarang sekali aku nak dapat peluang bawak si kecik2 ini jalan2 and have fun. even kluaq kejap ja, but i know that they really appreciate it. the smile on their face lets me know that they love it, spending time with mummy and babah. heres their photos snapped by babah time melompat2 dlm balloon yg besaq =D
 
Mia
Kiki

Hope

Salam...
Its heavily rain outside, Alhamdulillah. i'm in the house, enjoying my 4 days off without being interupted by anyone. i enjoy spending time with my kids, watching cartoons, having meals together. it is the most precious moment in my busy life.

i'll be working tomorrow. will be having important meeting with the big bosses. sigh... such a boring agenda, however have to laaa... unless i own a company or self employed kan.

this week also, the new semester has started. fortunately, i chose a paper and an independent studies for this final semester. only have to attend one class a week for about three hours, while for the independent studies, i have to choose my own interest 'to dig deep inside'.

my hope, to finish my studies with flying colours by the end of this year. InshaAllah. my mind set need also to be tuned, as i plan for a big change in my life, may Allah bless and grant me the opportunity. as for now, i can only hope that everything will be going according to plan. Allah knows best! Ameen.

Wednesday 12 September 2012

- aku -

Bismillah ...
 
Aku...
dilahirkan 30 years ago di sebuah kampung, dikelilingi sawah padi, umah arwah tokwan.
anak ke3 drpd tujuh beradik. 4 girls and 3 boys.
abah, keja biasa2 saja, askar wataniah + kakitangan kerajaan.. sampai sekarang suka menembak, ada senapang and license yg sah. mak, surirumah, suka masak, kuat berleter - its normal =)
masuk sekolah rendah di kodiang, sekolah menengah di arau, ipt di shah alam.
dapat diploma and degree masuk keja gomen. sekarang dah enam tahun keja. keja tukang tulis.
dah kawin, anak so far dua, alhamdulillah. suka belajaq, cari ilmu sebab aku ni kurang ilmu.
sambung mengaji kat uum pulak, inshaAllah abih ujung tahun ni. nak cuba bidang baru kalau ada rezeki.
 
Aku...
ada prinsip sendiri - tak suka jadi lembu dicucuk hidung, ada moto sendiri - usaha tangga kejayaan.
suka memahami isu dari sudut yg tersirat, its komplikated, tapi refection kat cermin tu tak selalu betul. it may deceive, penuh penipuan, so perlu hati2.
 
Aku...
suka apa? apa yg aku suka? muzik. tapi muzik is haram, so cari alternatif, layan qasidah, zikir2. masih mencuba utk meninggalkan muzik, harap berjaya, inshaAllah. movie? aku cuma suka movie mat salleh. action, romantic comedy, epic - kena kurangkan jugak. sport. suka tapi kurang buat sbb takdan. suka makan laksa, bihun sup, italian food - masak malas la pulak. hijau. aku memang suka hijau - kaler kegemaran Rasulullah jugak. hitam pun selalu jd pilihan.
 
Aku...
sentiasa cuba improve diri. perlu perbaiki diri - dulu agak jauh menyimpang. koleksi dosa, hanya Allah yg tau. dedah aurat. salam tak kira laki pempuan. astagfirullah - semoga Allah menerima taubat aku.
 
Aku...
terlalu kerdil untuk menjadi aku - "manusia adalah makhluk-Nya yang paling baik (mulia)". namun bersyukur dipilih menjadi makhluk yg terbaik - harus juga jadi hamba terbaik. stand up to worship Allah, the one and only. Allahuakbar!

Thursday 6 September 2012

Looking for God.


By: Yasmin Mogahed
I’ve been looking for God my whole life. I just didn’t know it.

When we study those things that we all seek—in life, in a companion, in everything—we’ll find that both the believer and the atheist are actually just seeking God. See, God is the designer. Whether you’re an atheist or a believer, God is the designer of your needs, your affinities, your inclinations. And He has designed these inner drives to fit the natural order: tawheed (to seek, recognize and submit to one single higher power).

Think for a moment about what you and I seek. What do you look for in a companion, for example? What are we running after and willing to give anything just to hear?
“I’m taking care of you.”
“It’s going to be okay.”
“I love you. Always. That will never diminish or change.”
“You can hold on to me.”
“I will never let you down.”
“I will never hurt you.”
“I will never leave you.”
“I will always be there for you.”
“I appreciate you.”
“I see you.”
“I understand you.”
“I know who you are.”
“I’m close to you.”
“I will forgive you.”
“You don’t have to be perfect.”
“I will never abandon you.”
“I will never betray you.”
“I got your back.”
“I’ll take care of it.”
“I’m listening. I’m really listening.”
“I’ll never let them hurt you.”
“I’ll always protect you.”
“I’ll never leave you.”
“You are never alone.”
“I will never leave you alone.”
“When everything around you is falling apart, I’ll hold you up.”
“I truly only want what’s best for you.”
“Even when you’re messing up, I will still forgive you.”
“Even when you’re unable to give, I will always give you.”
“Even when you’re fighting me, I’ll still be kind. I still won’t abandon you.”
“No matter what you do, I can always forgive you.”
“I love you despite your weaknesses and your faults.”
“I will give you peace.”
“I will make you happy.”
“I will give you stability.”
“I will give you strength and power.”
“I will cure you.”
“I will give you status and respect.”
“I will always comfort you.”
“No matter how tiny the gesture is, if you do it for me, I’ll appreciate and reward you for it.”
“If you turn to me, I’ll be there for you, no matter what.”
“No matter what you’ve done to me, I can always forgive you.”

The truth is, when we thought we were looking for a good husband or a good wife or a good job or a lot of money or a lot of fame, we were really just looking for God. So it’s no wonder that we got disappointed when the husband, the wife, the job, the money or the fame didn’t fill our need—or our emptiness.
Even that emptiness itself was created for a purpose: To drive us to fill it. The problem is we try to fill it with the wrong things. Everything inside us was created to enable our journey to find the true fill, to find Him. Ironically even shaytan and the nafs—if reacted to correctly—can become a means to reach Him. Shaytan and the nafs are our enemies. True. But how can we protect ourselves from them? Can the people help? Can money help? Can worldly power or weapons help protect us from our greatest enemies? Where is the *only* shelter from both shaytan and our nafs? The only shelter is in Allah. It’s like sending a storm to push us to the only refuge. To push us to Him (azza wa jal).
Even your sins can be used to push you to God. After all, who else can forgive you for them? Where else can you find shelter from the storm and horror of your own sins? Who else can take care of them and erase them and even transform them into good deeds?
Your fears can also be a means. When you’re scared, who else can protect you? Who else can give you comfort and safety, when you’re stranded in the middle of an ocean? When you’re poor, who else can provide? When you’re sad, who else can pull you up? When you’re broken, who else can mend your heart and your life? Who else can give life to what’s dead? Who else can cure you? Who else can save you? When you’re lost, who else can guide you?
Who else?
You thought the storm, the ocean, the fear, the sadness, the mistakes, the loss, the brokenness was all bad for you. But really it was only a means. It was all a vehicle to make you seek Him. To bring you back. To bring you back to completion, to happiness, to life. To bring you back to where you began. To bring you back to all that you really seek.
To bring you back to Him.

Wednesday 5 September 2012

petang yang syahdu =)

salam,
masih di office. story dah clear, meaning that i can go home now. tp masih kaku di kerusi ini dan jari masih menari2 di keyboard ini. having weird feeling... and thinking of the good old days. cuba memahami perencanaan yg maha Esa buat diri dan rasa bersyukur apabila dapat merungkai rahsiaNya yg telah ditetapkan untuk aku sejak di luth-mahfuz (betoi ka spelling aku nih? huhu).
setiap apa yg Allah dah atuq utk kita memang ada rahmat di sebaliknya. sama ada ujian yg baik atau tidak baik. kita akan hanya dapat merungkai misteri itu dengan bersyukur dgn apa yg dikurniaNya.
hamba yg terlalu kerdil macam aku nih, tak boleh terlalu demand, kena terima seadanya. yg penting sentiasalah cuba mengimprove diri agar menjadi better ummah. its not easy to be good, but we have to strive and set our goals to be the best. we'll never know if we dont try.
every person in this world has their chance to succeed and to live a good life. its for us to choose and decide. jika kita memilih untuk mencari redhaNya, inshaAllah akan dikurniakanNya. jika kita mencari murkanya, maka akan diperoleh juga adanya.
so, lets improve our iman and be a good muslim because as a muslim, theres no choice to be 'muslim yg sederhana or yg tak alim sangat'. as a muslim we must obey Allah and we have to be a perfect muslim, kalau tidak macam mana nak mendapat perfect goal iaitu JANNAH?

Saturday 1 September 2012

Salam Syawal...

Selamat hari raya, maaf zahir dan batin. dan lama aku tak posting. malaih der. heheheee... sempena raya nih, nak try besemangat posting balik la. habuan pembuka selera,jadi la takat nih. aku dok penin lagi dh banyak benda dah berubah. hihihihiii